- Family Guy Hit Me Blackjack Video
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Oct 03, 2019 Blackjack is water oak. A guy asked me what kind of tree one was I said 'Its what happens when a mommy red oak sleeps with its son.' Originally Posted by Familyguy. I like your vids so far. The first one on Wickr cracked me up. I think you have a career here:-) Thanks. Mar 17, 2006 What is your best Family Guy moment? When Peter is playing blackjack he is at 18 says 'hit me' gets at 20 lois tell him to stop; he says 'hit me' gets at 21. Lois says Peter you woN! Peter says 'hit me' Source(s). May 27, 2011 Me and my dad were playing black jack and then we got into a argument over black jack.the argument came about when I the dealer hit him 3 times.he had 5 cards that summed up to 18 and he told me it was a automatic win.i said what automatic win.i said how you only have 18 so i continued and my hand equaled 20.is his 5 cards right or is my logic wrong.i don't think we were.
glenwiggy
I have been a smartass for forty-seven years. That would be socially accepatble if I were one hundred years old, but the fact is that I am forty-seven.
Throughout the years, being a smartass has cost me plenty in immaterial ways. While attending second grade at a Catholic elementary school, I received several smacks on the hand by one of many crazy nuns, most notably for putting Alka Seltzer tablets in the holy water basins. The act itself didn’t cause much commotion, until I raised my arms and uttered loudly in the back of church, “Behold, the power of the Lord!” The other kids laughed. Sister Mary What’s Her Face did not. In junior high and high school, being a smartass cost me considerably when pursuing the affections of young ladies. I had made many jokes and cracks at their expense. I thought I was charming and witty like a young Jim Halpert, when in fact, I was mean and obnoxious like a Dwight Schrute. (I sincerely apologize to every girl that I offended from 1978 to 1984–that would be all of them.) As an adult, you’d think that the regulations and the discipline required of armed forces personnel would have made me quit being a smartass while in the Air Force. Not true. I still made smartass remarks from time to time to supervisors. I simply prefaced the comments with a “sir” or “ma’am,” you know, as a sign of respect. My family and friends are OK with me being a smartass because they’ve learned over the years to ignore my antics at will. Plus, most of my family and friends are smartasses themselves, albeit in a tamer manner than me.
Being a wiseguy is a conscious choice. I certainly know how to NOT be a smartass–that clearly distinguishes me from someone who is a “dumbass” or a “jackass.” I choose not to be ordinary or lame. The fun associated with being a smartass has always outweighed the cost. Until last week.
While playing blackjack at a casino in Colorado, I held a hand of A-3 against the dealers eight. Basic strategy called for me to hit, which I did by dragging the cards over the felt toward my body. The dealer gave me a ten, face up on the table. Fourteen. Using basic strategy again, I motioned for another hit. It was a face card. Twenty-four. I busted and lost. Here is where my brain and mouth shifted into smartass gear. In an attempt to be funny, I motioned for a third hit, thinking there was no way that the dealer would give me another card. I had two cards in my hand, plus twenty that was already showing in front of my hand. The sleepy dealer gave me another face card. Thirty-four. Even more busted. The dealer noticed the snafu the same time that I flipped over my cards and exclaimed, “Crap, I was just messin’ with you!” His expression was an equal combination of amusement and anger. He responded, “Hah, hah—you got me.” He then called the pit boss over who was not amused in the least. “Burn it!” she said loudly without lecturing me. The dealer took the face card and tucked it away in the discard pile.
The story takes a dark turn at this point. I was sitting on third base with only one other player at the table. The dealer continued the game by showing a four underneath his eight. He had twelve. The next card was another eight. The dealer totaled twenty. He would’ve busted with a twenty-two if I had not been a smartass moments earlier. The man sitting to my right had a nineteen. This man, who resembled a well-fed and well-connected mafia boss, was not pleased. You should’ve seen the look he gave me—it was the same look a guy once gave me at a bar in Daytona Beach while I was partying with a bunch of friends during Memorial Day weekend. The look came seconds before the guy cold-cocked my face, sending me to the floor with a black eye, because I had made a drunken, smartass comment. Meanwhile, my friends did nothing to help or protect me against the guy who cold-cocked me because they knew I had probably just made a drunken, smartass comment to the guy who had every right to cold-cock me for it seconds later.
After his $25 bet was whisked away, the large blackjack player to my right grumbled and started to stand. Something was gonna happen. I pleaded to the pit boss, “Please don’t make this guy lose because I was a smartass!” No luck. The pit boss said that the card must be burned since it was uncovered in play. The cards could not be backed up. In response, I quickly tossed the other player two $25 chips. One that he lost on the hand, plus another for what he should’ve won. I also quickly apologized with a beet-red face. The man sat down and gave me a sarcastic little smile, obviously still miffed, but satisfied at the turn of events. The incident was over. Being a smartass cost me $50.
Do you think that was the end of my smartassedness? No way. Just yesterday, as I was emerged from a pool after swimming laps with an underwater iPod adapter and waterproof headphones, a guy pointed to my ear and asked, “Do those things work?” I was a little confused by the obvious question, so I responded, “What do you mean?” The guy repeated, “Do those headphones work in water?” I was dumbfounded. He just WATCHED me swim and emerge from the pool wearing waterproof headphones and the iPod adapter strapped to my arm. My entire body was dripping wet. I answered, “No. They don’t work,” then rolled my eyes and walked away. Whatever the cost, being a smartass is way better than being a dumbass.
Glen Wiggy
Author of '1536 Free Waters and Other Blackjack Endeavors--Finding Profit and Humor in Card-Counting'
Throughout the years, being a smartass has cost me plenty in immaterial ways. While attending second grade at a Catholic elementary school, I received several smacks on the hand by one of many crazy nuns, most notably for putting Alka Seltzer tablets in the holy water basins. The act itself didn’t cause much commotion, until I raised my arms and uttered loudly in the back of church, “Behold, the power of the Lord!” The other kids laughed. Sister Mary What’s Her Face did not. In junior high and high school, being a smartass cost me considerably when pursuing the affections of young ladies. I had made many jokes and cracks at their expense. I thought I was charming and witty like a young Jim Halpert, when in fact, I was mean and obnoxious like a Dwight Schrute. (I sincerely apologize to every girl that I offended from 1978 to 1984–that would be all of them.) As an adult, you’d think that the regulations and the discipline required of armed forces personnel would have made me quit being a smartass while in the Air Force. Not true. I still made smartass remarks from time to time to supervisors. I simply prefaced the comments with a “sir” or “ma’am,” you know, as a sign of respect. My family and friends are OK with me being a smartass because they’ve learned over the years to ignore my antics at will. Plus, most of my family and friends are smartasses themselves, albeit in a tamer manner than me.
Being a wiseguy is a conscious choice. I certainly know how to NOT be a smartass–that clearly distinguishes me from someone who is a “dumbass” or a “jackass.” I choose not to be ordinary or lame. The fun associated with being a smartass has always outweighed the cost. Until last week.
While playing blackjack at a casino in Colorado, I held a hand of A-3 against the dealers eight. Basic strategy called for me to hit, which I did by dragging the cards over the felt toward my body. The dealer gave me a ten, face up on the table. Fourteen. Using basic strategy again, I motioned for another hit. It was a face card. Twenty-four. I busted and lost. Here is where my brain and mouth shifted into smartass gear. In an attempt to be funny, I motioned for a third hit, thinking there was no way that the dealer would give me another card. I had two cards in my hand, plus twenty that was already showing in front of my hand. The sleepy dealer gave me another face card. Thirty-four. Even more busted. The dealer noticed the snafu the same time that I flipped over my cards and exclaimed, “Crap, I was just messin’ with you!” His expression was an equal combination of amusement and anger. He responded, “Hah, hah—you got me.” He then called the pit boss over who was not amused in the least. “Burn it!” she said loudly without lecturing me. The dealer took the face card and tucked it away in the discard pile.
The story takes a dark turn at this point. I was sitting on third base with only one other player at the table. The dealer continued the game by showing a four underneath his eight. He had twelve. The next card was another eight. The dealer totaled twenty. He would’ve busted with a twenty-two if I had not been a smartass moments earlier. The man sitting to my right had a nineteen. This man, who resembled a well-fed and well-connected mafia boss, was not pleased. You should’ve seen the look he gave me—it was the same look a guy once gave me at a bar in Daytona Beach while I was partying with a bunch of friends during Memorial Day weekend. The look came seconds before the guy cold-cocked my face, sending me to the floor with a black eye, because I had made a drunken, smartass comment. Meanwhile, my friends did nothing to help or protect me against the guy who cold-cocked me because they knew I had probably just made a drunken, smartass comment to the guy who had every right to cold-cock me for it seconds later.
After his $25 bet was whisked away, the large blackjack player to my right grumbled and started to stand. Something was gonna happen. I pleaded to the pit boss, “Please don’t make this guy lose because I was a smartass!” No luck. The pit boss said that the card must be burned since it was uncovered in play. The cards could not be backed up. In response, I quickly tossed the other player two $25 chips. One that he lost on the hand, plus another for what he should’ve won. I also quickly apologized with a beet-red face. The man sat down and gave me a sarcastic little smile, obviously still miffed, but satisfied at the turn of events. The incident was over. Being a smartass cost me $50.
Do you think that was the end of my smartassedness? No way. Just yesterday, as I was emerged from a pool after swimming laps with an underwater iPod adapter and waterproof headphones, a guy pointed to my ear and asked, “Do those things work?” I was a little confused by the obvious question, so I responded, “What do you mean?” The guy repeated, “Do those headphones work in water?” I was dumbfounded. He just WATCHED me swim and emerge from the pool wearing waterproof headphones and the iPod adapter strapped to my arm. My entire body was dripping wet. I answered, “No. They don’t work,” then rolled my eyes and walked away. Whatever the cost, being a smartass is way better than being a dumbass.
Glen Wiggy
Author of '1536 Free Waters and Other Blackjack Endeavors--Finding Profit and Humor in Card-Counting'
Headlock
That made me laugh. Thank you. I am a smartass too.
EvenBob
I answered, �No. They don�t work,� then rolled my eyes and walked away. Whatever the cost, being a smartass is way better than being a dumbass.
Here's a lesson for you. He was asking in a rhetorical
conversational way if they worked. Like somebody
saying 'nice day, huh.' They can see its a nice day,
they aren't asking you if its nice, they aren't asking
for verification. They're just making conversation.
You're not a smart ass, you're just a common troublemaker.
'It's not enough to succeed, your friends must fail.' Gore Vidal
terapined
You did the right thing tossing the 2 chips, Some may not have done that.Family Guy Hit Me Blackjack Video
I didn't know underwater headphones existed. That's pretty neat. Are they actually earphones, small enough to fit in ear or headphones. I gotta imagine they fit in the ear which I find uncomfortable. I prefer the ones that sit just outside the ear canal and are held with ear hooks. Anyway, how's the sound? I listen while I bike and walk, but never considered swimming as an activity to listen to music to.
'Everybody's bragging and drinking that wine, I can tell the Queen of Diamonds by the way she shines, Come to Daddy on an inside straight, I got no chance of losing this time' -Grateful Dead- 'Loser'
AlanMendelson
What a great story!! Well written and worth YOUR $50. LOL
odiousgambit
I answered, �No. They don�t work,�
Bob, it looks like you take your text to some software [where at least this one time it got converted from ordinary text] then you paste it in again.
So you are busted for the 'short lines' thing you do, it comes from that, right, admit it! [g]
Blackjack Hit Or Stand
Ummm, I'm guessing you like some auto-save feature.the next time Dame Fortune toys with your heart, your soul and your wallet, raise your glass and praise her thus: “Thanks for nothing, you cold-hearted, evil, damnable, nefarious, low-life, malicious monster from Hell!” She is, after all, stone deaf. ... Arnold Snyder
Zcore13
Enjoyed the story and well written Glen. Well done.ZCore13
Family Guy Hit Me Blackjack Game
I am an employee of a Casino. All the personal opinions I post are my own and do not represent the opinions of the Casino or Tribe that I work for.
glenwiggy
You did the right thing tossing the 2 chips, Some may not have done that.
I didn't know underwater headphones existed. That's pretty neat. Are they actually earphones, small enough to fit in ear or headphones. I gotta imagine they fit in the ear which I find uncomfortable. I prefer the ones that sit just outside the ear canal and are held with ear hooks. Anyway, how's the sound? I listen while I bike and walk, but never considered swimming as an activity to listen to music to.
I didn't know underwater headphones existed. That's pretty neat. Are they actually earphones, small enough to fit in ear or headphones. I gotta imagine they fit in the ear which I find uncomfortable. I prefer the ones that sit just outside the ear canal and are held with ear hooks. Anyway, how's the sound? I listen while I bike and walk, but never considered swimming as an activity to listen to music to.
The earbuds fit in the ear. The sound is relatively good if the buds fit snugly. Check out a company online called H20 Audio for many waterproof sound products. Glen
1BB
The dealer should not have dealt a card to a hand that had obviously broken. For that reason I would not have given the other player anything. That's what supervisors are for.Many people, especially ignorant people, want to punish you for speaking the truth. - Mahatma Ghandi
Ahigh
Great story. Thanks for sharing.
- This is a hole card game
- Dealer peeks on Aces and 10-point cards
- Double down on any 2 cards
- Split once to make 2 hands
- One card to split Aces
- A split Ace and a 10 counts as 21
- Unlike 10-point cards can be split
- Minimum Bet: 1
- Maximum Bet: 1000
- Other rules are adjustable
- Dealer peeks on Aces and 10-point cards
- Double down on any 2 cards
- Split once to make 2 hands
- One card to split Aces
- A split Ace and a 10 counts as 21
- Unlike 10-point cards can be split
- Minimum Bet: 1
- Maximum Bet: 1000
- Other rules are adjustable
RULES Decks: Double After Split: Surrender: Soft 17:
This is our first blackjack game and trainer and I'm proud to finally add our version 2 with enhanced graphics and the ability to learn how to count cards to my website. The game is mostly self-explanatory. If you make an inferior play, the game will warn you first. I recommend that before you play for real money both online in person that you practice on the game until you very rarely are warned you a making an inferior play. If doubling or splitting is mathematically the correct play, but you don't have enough chips, the game will give the best advice for what you can afford to do. Do not change rules mid-hand. If you do, the change will not take effect until the next hand. The advice is based on my own analysis and basic strategy tables for one, two, and four+ decks. The deck(s) is(are) shuffled after every hand.
Family Guy Blackjack Hit Me
If you find any bugs, please contact me. A screenshot would be appreciated if you claim the game is misplaying a hand. I get a lot of incorrect reports that the advice given is incorrect. This usually can be explained by the user not using the correct basic strategy for the rules selected. I have also had many comments about the advice on a player 16, composed of 3 or more cards, against a 10. As a rule of thumb, the player should stand in that situation. However, that is a basic strategy exception. The game only knows basic strategy. Also, please note that it is a standard blackjack rule that split aces get one card each. If one of them is a ten, it is not a blackjack, it is just 21 points. That is how blackjack is usually played.
Family Guy Hit Me Blackjack Youtube
I would like to thank JB for his outstanding work on this game, and Dingo Systems for the cards.
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